MeJane's blog by Nadine Nicholson


3 steps to recover back to self after feeling rattled #mejane

Nadine Nicholson - Wednesday, December 06, 2017
3 steps to recover back to self after feeling rattled #mejane

Think back to a time when you decided to do something – based on what you thought was right for you – and it did not work out the way you thought.

It may even feel like the experience shook you up, rattled you, set you back or even created some mistrust in your ability to make good decisions for yourself.

Can you relate?

One of my coaching clients made a change in her business months ago based on the best intentions and knowledge at the time.

It didn’t work out the way she hoped and now she’s feeling a bit shaken up and questioning her self-confidence.

The other day she asked, “Nadine will you write a blog article on how to recover back to self after feeling rattled?”

“Yes, absolutely!” I replied.

Here are three steps to recover back to self after feeling rattled:

1. Let yourself feel and move your emotion

Before trying to figure out what to do next and try to solve the situation, let yourself feel what you’re feeling. Emotion is meant to be in MOTION, so don’t try to stuff it down and put a lid on it. That will only make it worse.

Let yourself feel whatever is coming up, whether it’s fear, sadness, anger, disgust or surprise. Find a quiet place in your home to reflect or go for a walk outside in nature. The key is to not let yourself avoid feeling what you’re feeling. Let yourself feel it so you can move the emotion.

2. Remember nothing is wrong and honour your decision

My hunch is you decided the course of action based on your best ability and knowledge at the time. Sure, you know more now and as the cliché goes, hindsight is 20/20.

As you look back now from your current vantage point, it is imperative to honour your decision back then. Your decision was the decision you made at the time with your best ability. It is not about a “right” or “wrong” decision – the decision is simply the decision.

Self-acceptance and self-love are crucial right now. If you beat yourself up by thinking you made the “wrong” decision, you drastically limit your ability to learn from this experience now.

By honouring the decision you made back then – even if you wouldn’t make the same decision today – you exponentially increase your ability to grow and benefit from this experience. When it all boils down, it is a CHOICE to honour your original decision. When you can do that, move onto the next point.

3. Ask yourself what you learned and act from there

Take some time to get still and quiet with yourself and journal about your experience:

  • What did you learn?
  • What are the “blessons” (blessings and lessons) from this experience?
  • What opened up for you?
  • What would you do differently next time?
  • What are you grateful for?
  • What do you know for sure, now?
  • What are you ready to say “yes” and “no” to, going forward?
  • What actions do you want and need to take?
  • What commitments are you making going forward?

I truly believe that difficult situations happen FOR you, not to you.

By honouring yourself in the process, you will recover back to self a lot more smoothly and quickly.

This will allow you to learn and grow from the experience – and build your self-confidence in ways you couldn’t have had without the experience in the first place.

Your Call to Action

What resonated with you from this article? How might this help you? I invite you to leave a comment below and let me know.